This blog was started as a way to work through the grief of losing my baby March 9, 2011. I found reading stories of other women comforting while I've been going through this and hope that I can help anyone else experiencing the same thing.

Friday, August 26, 2011


I'm still feeling a bit down. I've been wanting to write in here all week, but this is my busiest week of the year. I run a campus recreation center on a University campus and the students are coming back this week. I have so many obligations during this week. So I've been busy.

There are a few people on campus that I'm friends with and wanted to share with them my newest sadness, just because I felt they would understand or have some sympathy for me.

Sometimes sharing is a mistake. I told one person and she was really understanding during my last miscarriage. But this time when I told her I had a miscarriage around 6 1/2 weeks she said "Oh we just find out way too early we are pregnant these days.". I was like seriously???? Um 6 1/2 weeks for me was like 2 missed periods since I have 25 day periods. I looked it up and it was 48 days that I was pregnant. So yeah basically 2 missed periods. You don't think I would have figured it out even without a test by then? It just seemed like a really dismissive thing to say.

I think I'll keep it to myself from now on unless someone really seems like they know something is going on with me. I think this sucks though because there is an odd silencing thing going on around miscarriage. People just don't talk about it unless it happens to them or once it happens to them they might share it with someone else it happens to. Why is there a stigma around this? Why are people idiots about knowing what to say?


  1. I'm sorry for her inconsiderate comment :( It sucks because you shouldn't have to be silent about your miscarriage...I mean you are going through a loss, no matter what gestation it happens. You're dealing with this emotionally and physically. I don't know why people choose to say such stupid things to babyloss parents...probably because they have NO idea what it's like. Again, I'm sorry for your loss and I'm sorry you had to hear her stupid comment. It's not fair :(

  2. I agree with the comment above and I agree with you: there is stigma around all types of childloss and it is just ridiculous, people need to learn how to hold their tongue or just say "I'm sorry for your loss." and keep it at that!

  3. ugh, how rude! I have told very few people about the pregnancy and loss. I worry about people not being considerate of the hurt it caused us. It's sad that so many people act like early loss isn't important or worth grieving.