Tuesday, April 5, 2011
I feel betrayed by my own body. Why did my body give me a baby with Down Syndrome. Why did my eggs not function properly. Not only that, but if I was chosen somehow to have this baby that was special why was he taken away from me? It's just not fair. It's like I have no control. It's hard to not have control. I enjoy control. I control all aspects of my life. I'm all about having control. I don't like it when others are in charge. I like to be in control. So this feels like a giant betrayal, and it's myself. And there is nothing I can do about it. I miss my baby so much.