This blog was started as a way to work through the grief of losing my baby March 9, 2011. I found reading stories of other women comforting while I've been going through this and hope that I can help anyone else experiencing the same thing.

Monday, May 23, 2011


I had a really bad day yesterday. I barely got out of bed. I knew that today marked 30 weeks that I "should" have been pregnant. I guess I kind of allowed myself to really mourn on Sunday rather than drag it into my week and have to deal with it. It kind of worked too. I'm glad.

Basically I just stayed in bed about 90% of the day. I read and slept and just avoided real life. It worked I guess, because today I'm feeling okay and I'm actually going to teach my first Zumba class since finding out the bad news about Bear. So it's been 3 months since I've taught anything. I've not really exercised either so I hope that I can make it through. I just finished up my playlist and hope I can practice two of the new songs I added before class.

I'm still hopeful that this month could be the month for baby #2. I'm sure it's not likely, but there's no sense being a pessimist right? At least I can be optimisticly hopeful and deal with it when it doesn't happen. I will probably take a test on Wed. of this week. My period would be due on Friday. Although I am doing the whole charting temping thing and it seems to think that I ovulated later than I would have normally. So maybe my period would start later. I think it might be because I was so stressed about that IUD thing with the doctor's office. That makes a lot of sense to me!

Well....I'm off to teach some Zumba. I am sad that I'm not 30 weeks pregnant with Bear, but I think I'm coping okay today at least.

1 comment:

  1. Sorry Sunday was a rough day for you. I understand, though. I hope your class went well!! Did you POAS yet?? I don't think I've seen you post on BBC...

    Wishing you so much luck this cycle!